I'm Sorry

My eating disorder has a grip on me and it effects everyone around me.

I don't mean to do this to you.
I'm sorry I lie about everything.
I'm sorry I push you away.
I'm so sorry I made myself sick afther all the effort you made.
I'm sorry I fake illness to cover it all up.
I'm sorry I made you cry.
I'm sorry I made you feel the guilt.
I'm sorry I flushed the dinner you made down the toilet.
I'm so sorry I'm so selfish.
I'm sorry my health is of great concern to you.
I'm sorry for all the attention you have to give to me.
I'm sorry I can be stubborn and moody.
I'm sorry my moodswings get worse and worse.
I'm sorry I'm breaking your heart.
I'm sorry I can't make you happy.
I'm so sorry I self-harm.
I'm sorry I visit pro-ana sites.
I'm sorry I can't spent a happy life with you.
I'm sorry I hurt you so much.
I'm sorry for all the medicin bills.
I'm sorry I can't go out for a meal with you.
I'm sorry this isn't the life you hoped for.
I'm sorry I never told you: I'm scared this is going to kill me.

All in all I'm just plain sorry for all the lies and hurt I caused.

I know somethimes I don't seem thankfull.
Even when you think I don't love you..

I DO!

Life isn't fair and you are true hero's.

Thanks for all your support and for still beeing there for me afther all this.."